If you see yourself as a serious spiritual seeker who is striving to evolve, there are three key values of life that you will find necessary to adopt. Each of them are directed to match the three aspects of your personality – your body, emotions and intellect.

The three values to be taken up and practiced are: truthfulness at the intellectual level, non-violence at the emotional level and self-control at the body level.

Truthfulness – the ability to live up to our ideals

We know that to be honest and speak the truth is truthfulness. But there’s more.

We are all convinced of certain ideals in life. These are what we consider good, right and true for us. Truthfulness is the ability to act upon those convictions under all circumstances.

For instance, if we value honesty, we need to live up to that ideal at all times. However, we often compromise on our ideal. When the truth will give others a bad opinion of us, deprive us of something that we want or if it is inconvenient, we often tell a lie.

When we lie, an inner split occurs between what we know as truth and what we do. This shows up as anxiety and fear of being found out. It gnaws at our self-confidence and self-esteem. Such inner agitations erode our will and courage of conviction to live up to face other challenges in life.

Honesty is only one example of an ideal in life. You may have big plans and ideals such as  to raise awareness to prevent domestic violence, childhood poverty or gun violence. Or, your ideal may be something simpler and smaller such as never taking your work worries home at night, respecting and assisting your elderly parents, or saying a prayer of thanks before your meals.

Whatever be our ideal, as we stand by them through obstacles, difficulties or criticism, we are being truthful to them. Truthfulness cultivates integrity of character. With integrity, we grow and glow in life.


Non-violence is to not cause harm to others. Why is non-violence prescribed as a value to be practiced at the level of the emotions? The simple reason is that violence is an emotional response.

To curb our negative emotional reactions to what our intellect knows to be true and good is non-violence.  For example, when we harbor feelings of anger, hatred or jealousy, they generate negative thoughts which translate into harmful actions.

Paul and Paula are competing for the same promotion at work. Paul gets the position, and even though Paula reluctantly admits that Paul is better suited for the job, she cannot help but feel jealous. She inwardly wishes that Paul performs badly and gets laid off. She purposely bungles her part in a project headed by Paul to make him look bad to the boss.

Negative thoughts, even though unseen, travel to the person they are directed towards and create an underlying tension in the relationship. Unkind words, as we know, do hurt us. Harming another physically goes against what is good, right and true because we ourselves do not want to be harmed.

Spiritual masters everywhere fervently urge us to never curse or wish harm to anyone. This only backfires on us because we are sowing bad karmic seeds which we will have to reap and suffer for in the future.

Consciously practicing non-violence, helps us to develop a finer appreciation and sensitivity to the needs of others who have a common existence with us.


Enjoy the world, but let not the world enjoy you. Eat food, but let not the food eat you. drink, but let not the drink drink you.– Swami Chinmayananda

Self-control is a value that a seeker is asked to practice at the physical level. Self-control does not mean depriving yourself of the simple pleasures of the senses. It means being able to regulate and balance our activities so that sensuous pleasures do not become our primary focus in life.

Life is not meant only to eat, drink and be merry. Our human life has a much higher purpose than that. We are here to unfold the spiritual essence within us. We cannot stay focused on our greater goal if we dissipate our time and energies on excessive indulgence. Moderation is the key.

Cornerstones of a spiritual life

Truthfulness, non-violence and self-control are the cornerstones of living a spiritual life. If at the intellectual level we can stay true to our goal of rediscovering our essential spirit that is common in life everywhere, then it becomes easy to practice non-violence at the emotional level and self-control at the physical level.

The path to our spiritual evolution becomes clear and easy with these three fundamental values of life.

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Manisha Melwani

Manisha Melwani is a teacher and the author of, "So You're a Spiritual Being–Now What?" She offers spiritual and wellness solutions for life and stress management. She teaches classes in personal growth, stress management and meditation. She is based in Richmond Hill and Markham, Ontario. Contact her for more information or to have her speak to your group or organization. She also offers private counselling sessions on-line.
Manisha Melwani

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